and this marks the
200th post entry for my blog!
..so let's make this a good one, shall we?
i am not sure if i ever mentioned this on my blog before that i have this drawer where i keep all my past love letters in it. and i also said that if there ever came a day when i finally found my special someone, i would get rid of all of them.
well, today i did just that.
as i saw the flames slowly eat through the pictures and cards, i can honestly say that there were no lingering emotions going through my heart. the day i opened a new chapter in my life, was the day i finally closed 2 others for good. never again will i bring them up unless asked. whatever hate, love, regrets,
what-ifs i had just went up in flames together with the stuff.
ashes to ashes..
dust to dust..*
i got this
bad habit of mine: i tend to think a lot. in some cases, it's a good thing. like how i always think of the consequences before doing anything rash or like how i always make sure i have everything planned out before diving into something. but on other occasions, thinking too much into something is not a good thing. like when it comes to taking chances or when a response is needed immediately.
usually, when one thinks too much, they tend to worry about unnecessary things. like in my case, i never got into a relationship in the past before because i was always worrying about things.
"will we last..?"
"what if we break..?"
"is she really the one for me..?"
"is there someone better out there..?"
"what if her family don't like me..?"
"what if this.. what if that.."
that was why i never ever made the first move and always waited for something to happen. and even when something did happen, my mind would go into hyper over-drive and i'll start to imagine about a lot of things. and because of this constant worrying, nothing would ever develop.
but that all changed when you came into my life.
it was at that time when i told myself that i was tired of always waiting for something to happen and sick of always worrying about the future. yes, it was good to think about the future, but not to the extend of creating a future in your head that has not even happened. it's like how we all know we're all going to die one day, but that doesn't mean we should start worrying about death now.
** the remaining part of this entry contains a fair amount of mushiness and lovey-doveyness. you have been warned.. ** and as i look into your eyes that night, i knew i did not want to let such an opportunity slip out of my fingers again. yes, the future may be filled with obstacles and uncertainties. and who knows what the future holds for us. but nothing is set in stone.
the future is decided by the choices we make in the present.
so i've decided to stop worrying about the future and just live for the present. life is too short to be worrying about something that hasn't happen yet. i'll start worrying about future problems when the time comes.
one step at a time...
*
and who, you may ask, is that special someone?
my baby girl. the only one who can call me Bob ♥
(Magic 8 Ball was right once again..)
